This is another proof of how "spontaneous" i am and how easily i can get bored with something i was crazy about just a few hours/days ago. I signed up for M1 broadband internet merely one day after i first heard of it. I excitedly created a blog a few hours after i finished setting up my own internet line.
And i kinda abandoned it after a few days...
hahaha
THIS IS BAD!! That's why i'm trying to
change myself and thus, i won't give up blogging. At least for as long as i'm still in NJ. I hope. Whoops...
Actually i
drafted a few entries but decided that they're purely the products of my monthly PMS and i won't publish them (until, i don't know, maybe my next PMS?). Maybe one of the most important things i've learned over the years is that what you say and what you write can really leave scars in people's hearts and just ruin the whole relationships/friendships altogether. You should think not twice, but 70-ice times before saying things that you know will hurt people, and 700-ice times before writing hurtful things that you know you might regret after that. Cause spoken words can't be withdrawn and written stuff (e.g blog entries, emails etc) can't be nullified. I mean you can delete your post but if ppl already read it then its too bad.
Sometimes I can't control myself when i quarrel with people and i can say
really mean stuff. That's why more often than not i'll be the one saying "sorry" first, but sometimes i know there's a gap between us and saying sorry just can't simply erase everything. I'm such an ass at times.
There're some blogs that i really enjoy reading and incidentally, they all belong to some of the school's top GP students. I like blogs with substance, where the entries are not (only) emo, but full of feelings, wit and show that the person really thinks a lot about what's happening in his/her life. I really wonder when i can write like that, if ever at all. I mean their entries are normally quite long, but even if they write a few lines it's already much more impactful and powerful than my one whole page of rambling and crapping. Haiz. Life is sad mannnnn.
But then again, I can't bring myself to read novels, or cheem magazines like Times or Newsweek, and so have no rights to complain about my lack of general knowledge, poor vocab and bad expressions. Okay admittedly the only magazines i read in a month are 8Days and Seventeen. Newspapers are out of question. I can't stand flipping huge and flimsy pages so they'll end up falling all over the place and i'll get pissed (yet again. haha i realize i'm quite an easily piss-able person).
There are a lot of things i wish i could do but in actual fact i cant for nuts. Like dancing, or writing well, or playing sports, or running long distance (i mean 1.2km for me is considered very long already), or playing musical instruments, or concentrating during lessons (i realize that's quite a lot of things xD). And the friends surrounding me are just so darn good at them. Some people are even good at a lot of things. Life is so unfairrrrrr...
Thinking about unfairness in life. The Mr-Perfect-Complexion-Even-Tho-He-Doesnt-Even-Wash-His-Face Zhaowei got a teeny tiny pimple right above his lip! Like you know that area in between your nostrils and your lips? The pimple is right smack in the middle! wuahahahaha and i was like laughing at it like crazy over dinner. OMG like whenever i look at him the first and only thing i notice is his red pimple! XDD Its funny cause its the only one pimple i've ever seen popping up on his face in a loooooonnnngggg time and that red-dot baby aside, his facial skin is perfect.
And look at mine! Its so invaded by blackheads, whiteheads and spots that nobody even notice if one more pops up. Oh but there's this HUGE thing which has been on my right cheek since FOREVER and it refuses to go away. Worse, it has a little sister right next to it now. They compliment each other very well. Out of all things, i inherit my model mom's not-so-nice complexion. And that's the only not nice thing about her. And the only trait that identifies me as her daughter. OMg.. Blame it on stress. Maybe i should take zhaowei's advice and just do away with all the facial wash / toner crap. Water works best so they said.
I can't stand guys with perfect complexion. I feel like becoming Hannibal Lecter and just skin them alive. If i even know how to skin people. I mean i can't even tell where my heart is for goodness' sake.
